 One of my two standing-room-only(!) events in London this year. This one at Treadwell's Books. Hello! What a crazy summer, eh? I have been to many cities on my book tour for Tarot Life Lessons and The Occult Sylvia Plath, I've done a ton of podcast interviews, and I have had many new and delightful clients --all of which has kept me away from updating this website. Some of my summer highlights: Eight Illuminate Festivals (Lewes, DE; Richmond, VA; Annapolis, MD; Colombia, MD; Ocean City, MD; Clearwater, FL; Tampa Bay, FL; Naperville, IL; and another in Annapolis coming up on November 9th) Other festivals: Sacred Journey Market in Cincinnati, OH; Wellness Expo in Conroe, TX; Body Mind Spirit Expo in Colorado Springs, CO. Book store events at Lavender Moon Metaphysical in Ocean City, MD; Left Bank Books in St. Louis (watch the reading on YouTube), MO; Kranzberg Arts Foundation's High Noon Series in St. Louis; Spine Indie Bookstore and Cafe in St. Louis; Richmond Public Library in Richmond, VA; Tidepool Bookshop in Worcester, MA; Caprichos Books in Ocean Pines, MD; Magick Cauldron in Houston, TX; Watkins Bookshop in London, England; Treadwell's Books in London, England; Diversey Barnes and Noble in Chicago, IL; and most recently, Springfield Barnes and Noble in Springfield, IL. TONS of podcast interviews! It's hilarious to me how they draw people in with their teasers. Have a chuckle with me, maybe learn something, and hear more about my books. Please like and subscribe to some of these amazing programs: Next Level Soul Podcast "Top Tarot Card Expert Predicts the Future of the Rest of 2024 & US Economy! Julia Gordon-Bramer" Victor Fuhrman's Vox Novus "Julia Gordon-Bramer The Occult Sylvia Plath" Lifeblood "The Value of Tarot Card Reading"Typical Skeptic Podcast "Occult Tarot Psychic Reading" New Thinking Allowed with Jeremy Mishlove "Poetry and the Occult with Julia Gordon-Bramer" Paranormal Yakker "The Occult Sylvia Plath" Witchlit Podcast "Julia Gordon-Bramer" Quantum Living Podcast "Decoding Tarot" From the Minds Podcast "Julia Gordon-Bramer: Psychic, Tarot Card Reader & Author" The Mystical Underground "The Occult and Sylvia Plath" One True Self "Interview with Julia Gordon-Bramer, Tarot Reader" The Infinite Wisdom "Tarot Life Lessons featuring Julia Gordon-Bremer" (misspelled) Daimonosophy with Paul Fredric "A Conversation with Julia Gordon-Bramer about The Occult Sylvia Plath" Rebel Spirit Radio "The Occult Sylvia Plath with Julia Gordon-Bramer" Pathways "Julia Gordon-Bramer speaks with host Paul O'Brien" A Guided Life with Laura West "Sylvia Plath, The Occult, and Kabbalah with Guest Julia Gordon-Bramer" Aeon Byte Gnostic Radio "The Occult Sylvia Plath" [If I was on your podcast and I missed posting it here, please let me know and I'll get it included!] Coming up in November: 'll be back in Annapolis, Maryland for the Illuminate Festival on November 9th November 10th you can get a personal tarot card reading and/or a signed copy of one of my books at Lavender Moon Metaphysical 14107 Coastal Highway, Ocean City, MD 21842 November 15-17th you can find me at the St. Louis Mystic Fair at the Machinist's Hall, 12365 St., Charles Rock Road in Bridgeton, MO. The rest of the next couple of months I will be doing my regular in-person readings and working private parties and corporate events. If you'd like to get me to your special event (in-person or by video!) or to set up a tarot card reading for yourself, just email me at [email protected] or message me through the website here. I'll close with one more picture from Treadwell's in London. It was truly one of those highlights of my career, right along with my Tarot Life Lessons book party last year. This picture below is my after-party upstairs in the bookstore. Thanks to their lovely and brilliant store owner, Christina, for all of her support: 
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 Hello! My website is in the process of being redesigned, but while that’s happening, my webmaster says I can still update here. It’s been a busy time with Tarot Life Lessons: Living Wisdom From the Major Arcana out this past November (Destiny Books), maneuvering through the holidays and tarot jobs, guesting on Gaia Network’s TV show Beyond Belief (that should air in May sometime), preparing to launch The Occult Sylvia Plath: The Hidden Spiritual Life of the Visionary Poet (May 7, Destiny Books), and planning a book tour. Whew!
Here is what I’ve got on my calendar so far. Please reach out if you’re in one of these cities and need more information on how to find me, or want me to come to your city? Let’s talk! St. Louis: Monday, March 4th 7-9 pm, Spine Indie Bookstore –reading and book signing for Tarot Life Lessons w/some free tarot readings to lucky attendees who buy a copy of the book. (spinebookstorecafe.com) Friday, April 26 (4-7 pm), Saturday, April 27, & Sunday, April 28 (11 am – 7 pm) St. Louis Mystic Fair, Machinist’s Hall, Bridgeton–Presentation and book signing at 5 pm Friday on Tarot Life Lessons w/some free readings; paid tarot card readings may be booked throughout the weekend $30 for 15 minutes. Check Facebook for info. Thursday, May 9th 12:00 -1 pm. Noon Reading Series presents the release of The Occult Sylvia Plath. Reading and book signing. Kranzberg Arts Foundation in the Listening Room of the High Low Bldg, 3301 Washington Ave, St. Louis 63103. Free. Books will be for sale. www.kranzbergartsfoundation.org Monday, May 27 (Memorial Day), Cherokee Caravan (Along the Historic Cherokee St. Antique Row), 9 a.m. – 5 p.m. Book sales and signing. I’m sharing space with the Mississippi Nights Book table. Should be fun! www.Facebook.com/CherokeeCaravanSTL Nacogdoches, TX: Thursday, March 7 and Friday, March 8, 4:30-6:30 pm, Bosslight Bookstore, Book signing for Tarot Life Lessons and paid tarot card readings $30 for 15 minutes. Richmond, VA: Sunday, June 2nd, Illuminate Festival Richmond, Richmond Marriott Short Pump, 10 am – 5 pm –Presentation on Tarot Life Lessons and The Occult Sylvia Plath, book signing, paid tarot readings (note: more Richmond events area TBA around this date) www.illuminatefestivals.com Annapolis, MD: Saturday, July 13, Illuminate Festival Annapolis, Anne Arundel Community College Main Campus, 10 am – 5 pm, –Presentation on Tarot Life Lessons and The Occult Sylvia Plath, book signing, paid tarot readings (note: more Annapolis area events TBA around this date) www.illuminatefestivals.com Saturday, November 9, Illuminate Annapolis, Anne Arundel Community College Main Campus, 10 am – 5 pm, –Presentation on Tarot Life Lessons and The Occult Sylvia Plath, book signing, paid tarot readings (note: more Annapolis area events TBA around this date) www.illuminatefestivals.com Columbia, MD: Saturday, July 20, Illuminate Festival Colombia, Ten Oaks Ballroom, 10 am – 5 pm, –Presentation on Tarot Life Lessons and The Occult Sylvia Plath, book signing, paid tarot readings (note: more Columbia area events TBA around this date) www.illuminatefestivals.com Ocean City, MD: Saturday, July 27, Illuminate Ocean City, Roland Powell Convention Center, 10 am – 5 pm –Presentation on Tarot Life Lessons and The Occult Sylvia Plath, book signing, paid tarot readings (note: more OC area events TBA around this date) www.illuminatefestivals.com Clearwater, FL: Sunday, August 11, Illuminate Clearwater Beach, Sheraton Sand Key Resort, 10 am – 5 pm –Presentation on Tarot Life Lessons and The Occult Sylvia Plath, book signing, paid tarot readings (note: more Clearwater area events TBA around this date) www.illuminatefestivals.com Naperville, IL (Chicago area): Sunday, September 29, Illuminate Naperville, Chicago Marriott Naperville, 10 am. – 5 pm —-Presentation on Tarot Life Lessons and The Occult Sylvia Plath, book signing, paid tarot readings (note: more Richmond events TBA around this date) www.illuminatefestivals.com Frederick, Maryland: Sunday, October 13, Illuminate Frederick, 10 am – 5 pm –Presentation on Tarot Life Lessons and The Occult Sylvia Plath, book signing, paid tarot readings (note: more Frederick area events TBA around this date) www.illuminatefestivals.com Rehoboth Beach, DE: Sunday, October 20, Illuminate Rehoboth, 10 am – 5 pm — Presentation on Tarot Life Lessons and The Occult Sylvia Plath, book signing, paid tarot readings (note: more Frederick area events TBA around this date) www.illuminatefestivals.com ANNAPOLIS, BOOK, BOOK READINGS, BOOK RELEASE, BOOK RELEASES, BOOKS, BOSSLIGHT, BOSSLIGHT BOOKSTORE, CHICAGO, CLEARWATER, CLEARWATERBEACH, COLOMBIA, FREDERICK, ILLUMINATE, ILLUMINATEFESTIVAL, ILLUMINATEFESTIVALS, ILLUMINATEOCEANCITY, MARYLAND, NACOGDOCHES, NAPERVILLE, NOON READING SERIES, REHOBOTH, REHOBOTHBEACH, RICHMOND, STLOUIS, TAROT, TAROT CARD READINGS, TAROT READINGS, VIRGINIA  Hi! I know I’ve neglected you over here. Part of the reason is that I have had some website problems, and the other is that I have been very busy working with my publisher Destiny Books/Inner Traditions on the release of my forthcoming book, Tarot Life Lessons: Living Wisdom from the Major Arcana. This is a book of my real-life stories as a professional tarot card reader, taken straight from my journals. The book is available to preorder with all major booksellers and will have an audiobook coming (read by yours truly) soon after! The official release date is November 7th, 2023.
If you’d like to get a copy of the book in your hot little hands, signed by me, come to the book release party! It is Wednesday, November 8, 2023 at the Center for Spiritual Living, 12875 Fee Fee Road, St. Louis, MO 63146 from 7 pm to 9 pm. We will have the physical books there for purchase, an opening reception and meet and greet, I’ll do a reading from the book, and there will be a book signing. It would mean so much to me if you would come. If you’ve already preordered the book, I’d still love you to come anyway and celebrate this day with me. Or you could buy an extra signed copy as a holiday gift. 🙂 The cover of my forthcoming bookTarot Life Lessons | Book by Julia Gordon-Bramer | Official Publisher Page | Simon & Schuster (simonandschuster.com) LIVING WISDOM FROM THE MAJOR ARCANA, PROFESSIONAL TAROT CARD READER, TAROT CARD READER, TAROT CARD READINGS, TAROT CARDS, TAROT LIFE LESSONS Alright, alright. I’ve been gone again for a long time. But this time for good reason! I have my own radio show! It started toward the end of December when I was talking to my friend Tony Colombo about the weekend programming at NewsTalkSTL. I asked him, “How does one get a radio show?” Really, it was more out of curiosity. I mused about having something of my own similar to the paranormal themes I used to be a guest for when I worked with Tony at other stations. I thought it would be fun to do free readings for callers so that listeners could understand what a tarot card reading with me was like (and to help others for free). I loved the idea of being able to promote kindred spirits and help authors I respected sell books. And maybe I’d sell a few of those too!
Well, Tony thought it was a great idea. Next came the name, because, as we know from spiritual teaching, nothing (good or bad) is real until it is named! Tom and I wandered the mall trying to get our steps in on bitter cold nights, trying ideas out. Too many of them sounded like bad band names. Souler Coaster, anyone? The best ones were already taken, like Beyond Belief. I saw a cellphone fix store and that’s when Mystic Fix came to me. Fix has a lot of good meanings: to situate, to repair, and to satisfy a craving (We will leave out the castration definition). And so, naming the show was part of its conjuring. NewsTalkSTL, meanwhile, had a pipe burst over the Christmas cold and lots of damage. The station co-owner suggested that my show start January 21st, but I bumped it to February 4th to be safely out of Mercury Retrograde’s shadow and to let NewsTalkSTL recover. The energy had to be good! Most importantly came the matter of finding a sponsor to pay for it. I spent the last days of December and the first week of January pitching the idea of the show that did not yet exist to businesses I thought might have interest. It felt very much like when I started Night Times magazine in the 1990s, getting my first check from Streetside Records–God Bless them–which was the $900 that changed my life. Here I was selling a dream again, with the same kind of energy of creating something, or maybe letting the something create me since I wasn’t entirely sure of what I was doing. Then, one of my dearest regular clients came through to promote his pet project, Kamaflight, which is a fascinating, therapeutic, and dare I say, sexy amalgam of yoga, meditation, and massage. Next, I needed a producer to be assigned to me, and I lucked out with the wonderful Leah Almstedt. We are becoming fast friends. Because I do nothing halfway (or maybe because I tend to go too far) I decided that I wanted this show to also be videocast and podcast. Radio is a one-shot communication; you have to be in the area at the right time to tune in. But podcast and videocast last in perpetuity. Truth is, creating any of it is out of my wheelhouse, but I wanted a way for my family and friends on the east coast to tune in/see me, as well as clients around the world. To get the station to do videocast would be an extra cost that I didn’t have, so I figured I’d do it myself. How hard could it be, right? (Ha ha. I’ll be getting to that). I had to plan the show(s), of course. Which meant finding good guests who could be available for the time we were pre-recording, synchronizing everyone’s schedule with producer Leah’s and the station’s studio availability. I wanted some kind of theme, so of course, I picked tarot. Every show has a tarot card theme assigned to it, in order of the cards. There are 78 tarot cards, so when I get through that many shows I can either repeat the themes with new guests, choose a reversed meaning of the cards, or try something new altogether. I’ll worry about that later. There were (are) lots of other moving parts. I needed a website for the show. And a social media presence outside of my posts of my cats, my family, and Plath. I needed a YouTube Channel (and all the others). Thank God next for my sister-in-law, Anne Peters, my web ninja who has been behind the scenes creating logos, making social network reels, and launching my website www.mysticfix.com. Recording the first show, I was a little shaky. I was not in full voice and unsure of what to say and when as I was not yet accustomed to being the one directing the whole thing (I did have a radio show of my own, The Writer’s Voice Hour, way back in 1994 and 1995 on KYMC community radio). Since then, though, I’ve always been a guest who could just smile and let the host go to commercial or whatever. I only just learned–the hard way–you don’t say the POINT in 101.9, and they don’t say FM anymore (we used to always say both in the 1990s). Being prerecorded has both challenges and benefits: The biggest benefit being, obviously, that if you screw up you can do it again. But with prerecorded, I’m cued to stop for commercials and news I don’t hear because it’s not there yet! I had to imagine introductory music that had not yet been created for me. Acting skills are involved. I’m learning. We’ve recorded three episodes and tonight is the show’s debut! 8:00 pm on NewsTalkSTL 101.9 and 94.1 FM. I set the video camera up and just let it go. The first episode’s video initially disappointed me because 1.) I was too far away from my guest, 2.) I sounded too shy and quiet, and 3.) my hair was a little wonky. My friend Garrett Enloe came to the first recording to take pictures for my website and be some moral support. My friend Tyler Kiwala was a fantastic first guest, and I interviewed a wonderful author in Great Britain, Rachel Patterson, on her occupation as a kitchen witch. Learning the video processing software was a bit challenging, but thanks to Tom, I got the basics down fairly fast and decided to use all that extra space between me and my guests! The videocast of Mystic Fix is now like a spiritual version of VH-1’s Pop-Up Videos (Yes, the 90s again. It was my favorite decade for so many things). I feel exceedingly creative and haven’t had this kind of energy and enthusiasm in a long time. It’s hard work, but it’s a blast. So, when and if you watch the first show, know that I wish I had been better. But my guests are fantastic. I really mean that. They save the show, and I still think, while I am not great, the first show is good. The second is even better and by the third, I found my footing. If you can’t listen to the radio tonight, I’ll have links posted on www.mysticfix.com and all my social networks on how and where to find us in podcast and videocast. Can’t wait to hear your thoughts. xo KAMAFLIGHT, MIND BODY SPIRIT, MYSTIC FIX, NEWSTALKSTL, PODCAST, RADIO, ST. LOUIS RADIO, VIDEOCAST  Hello and Happy New Year!
On this first day of 2023, we have a symbolic blank page on which to write our hopes, fears, prayers, and creative energies. All of these create our experience of this new year. Today, I hope that you celebrate possibilities and empower yourself to attract them. This is that “manifesting” buzzword you hear so much in spiritual circles. For me, it’s been another year of neglecting regular blog entries, but let’s get real: We all have too much to read and spend too much time anyway! I only want to write if I have something worthwhile to say to you. If you want the micro-blogging stuff, check out my Twitter @jgordonbramer. I am astounded to say that 2022 is over. And I’ve done some things! Manifesting is real! The highlights are:
OK. Back to manifesting! Hope you have a fab 2023! xo ALEJANDRO JODOROWSKY, BURSLEY MANOR, CAPE COD, DESTINY BOOKS, GARRET ENLOE, HISTORY AND MYSTICISM, INNER TRADITIONS, MANIFESTING, MISSISSIPPI NIGHTS, MUSIC, MYSTIC FIX, NEW YEAR, NEWSTALKSTL, NIGHT TIMES MAGAZINE, RADIO, RICHARD LARSCHAN, ST. LOUIS, ST. LOUIS RADIO, STACY ENLOE, SYLVIA PLATH, TAROT LIFE LESSONS, TED HUGHES, THE MAGICIAN'S GIRL  Happy Holidays! It is now Hannukah, the Festival of Lights, for my Jewish friends and I love how so many of us share the idea of lights at this time of the year. Lights, of course, are symbolic of the light of God, and of enlightenment.
Funny story: my ex was Jewish and, while we could do Christmas, he wanted it all Santa-themed and not about Jesus. Which, for someone like me who grew up in Sunday School, who once starred as the Virgin Mary in the St. James Episcopal Church’s Christmas Pageant, bummed me out. And so, I kept a tiny, secret nativity scene stashed away as my rebellion. It had very simple figures, hand carved from wood. It is only about an inch and a half tall. I still have it. This year, there is no hiding. The Christmas Holiday started for me when we saw Peter Mayer and friends* with their Christmas show at Delmar Hall last week. Mayer was the son of missionaries, and he grew up in Africa for part of his childhood. The whole enchanted evening, with the lights, music, stories and lyrics got me thinking: WHAT IF the Christmas nativity is the ultimate parable? Hear me out before you roll your eyes that I might be getting too Jesus-y, or if you’re more fundamentalist, you might call me a blasphemer here. I accept that my views are not traditional. But: WHAT IF we are all born of the pure mother Earth, and reside alongside the animals in the kingdom of life? What if during our darkest days, if we bother to look, we can see that we are guided by stars and by angels? What if the shepherds and the wise ones who came before us will steer our direction and give us the gifts we need? What if the nativity story is to teach us that we are salvation for ourselves and for the world? You are the light of the world, friends. These short, dark days of winter are cold and can be tough. Despite that, I hope that you shine, shine, shine! In other news, here is an interview with me from MysticMagazine: https://www.mysticmag.com/uncatego…/juliabramer-interview/ Enjoy! *I mistakenly called this a PM Reunion on Facebook and Twitter. It was not the group PM, just Peter Mayer with other musicians. CHRISTMAS, CHRISTMAS PAGEANT, DELMAR HALL, ENLIGHTENMENT, FESTIVAL OF LIGHTS, HANNUKAH, HOLIDAY, LIGHT, NATIVITY, PARABLES, PAUL MAYER  Hi Everyone,
Sorry I’ve been so bad about blogging. I’ve been finishing up two books for Inner Traditions publishers, and then I went right into my busy Octoberfest/Halloween season. I should have a little break between now and the Christmas party rush and will hopefully catch up a little. In the meantime, I’m sharing the catalog page and cover design for my forthcoming Tarot Life Lessons: Living Wisdom from the Major Arcana. To those of you who have been following my writing career, the working title of this book was The Tarot Diaries. I don’t have a release date just yet–that should happen in the next couple of months, but it will be out on an Inner Traditions’ subsidiary, Destiny Books. I am told the famous Tarot and Occult writer, Alejandro Jodorowsky, published on this imprint so I am in good company. Here’s a link to the catalog page: TarotLifeLessons_CatPage What’s the other book? That is The Magician’s Girl: The History and Mysticism of Sylvia Plath and Ted Hughes. Title/Subtitle also subject to change! More on that as I learn it. I did a few podcasts and radio appearances in the last few months. My favorites were talking about how the spirit world is presented in Hollywood with Max on Movies, as well as another good LifeBlood podcast with George Grombacher called “Return to the Source.” Check them out if you get a few minutes! I’m filling up for weekend holiday parties in December, so reach out fast if you’re looking for my tarot services. And of course, I am always taking my regular weekday and weeknight appointments. Looking for a different gift idea? I can make you a custom gift certificate to print, email, or send by phone. Just email me at [email protected] or through this website for more information. ALEJANDRO JODOROWSKY, DESTINY BOOKS, GIFT CARDS, GIFT CERTIFICATES, HOLIDAY PARTIES, INNER TRADITIONS, LIFE LESSONS, LIFEBLOOD PODCAST, MAJOR ARCANA, MAX ON MOVIES, PODCASTS, RADIO SHOW, STORIES, SYLVIA PLATH, TAROT, TAROT CARD READER, TAROT CARDS, TED HUGHES  [Note: Right after I wrote the first draft of this, some friends had the tragedy of losing their daughter. Suddenly, everything I’d written seemed so dumb, and so this has been revised to honor my friends in their grief]
What a busy summer! I don’t know if it is Mercury retrograde or just decompression from such a relentless work schedule, but I’ve hit a wall and the last couple weeks have been more indulgent: visiting with friends, catching up on and scheduling doctor and dental checkups, going to concerts, and I’ve resumed writing poetry after months and months of scholarly nonfiction (which sort of deadens the creative impulses). For me, there is nothing lovelier than lying out in the sunshine, reading and writing poetry (my new go-to poet is John Rybicki). This is my recharging time before the big Halloween crush of events. I’ll have some TV and radio appearances coming up soon for which I will post links. A week ago, I was feeling overconfident about my fitness when I decided to move a wood pile from our wheelbarrow into our rolling garbage cans. I didn’t want to bother Tom about it. I thought rather proudly that I’d get this out of the way for both of us and together we’d marvel at how strong and efficient I am (ha). Stacking the wood from one container to the other was a breeze. No sweat, if a few splinters. Then I went to do the rolling, which of course means one must tip it backwards. There’s where I got a bit careless, and the whole thing, which probably weighed as much or more than I do, came smashing down upon me. I fell hard on my left hand, I cut up my left arm with some impressive gashes, scraped my nose and chin, and it looks as if someone beat my left thigh with a baseball bat. Not my finest moment. I’m starting to scab up now, and the bruising has gone from deepest purple to shades of yellow and plum. People ask if I was in a car accident. What did I realize about all of this? I wasn’t paying attention. I still think I could have successfully maneuvered the trash can IF I had concentrated and not been so careless. Lesson learned. Another lesson: Ask for help when it is readily available. I didn’t have to do it myself. It’s hard to believe we are past mid-September. If you pay attention, you can hear the seasons change: there are different insects, wilder winds, and the rustling of tree leaves beginning to dry out. The daylight has shortened and shifted. I try to remember that I am connected to this earth. We forget our oneness too often, busy in individual efforts and drama, like fighting with woodpiles. We forget our bodies, in health, sickness, and aging, are a part of the whole universal organization. We forget our efforts are a part of some greater momentum we cannot see. We forget that our feelings are in the sea of all feelings, that there is nothing that has not been experienced by some other, somewhere. Oneness can keep us sane, if only in not feeling alone. When I came into the house covered in blood, I went downstairs to Tom’s office choking back tears and said, “Tom, I f**ked up.” He immediately got the first aid kit and a bottle of hydrogen peroxide to clean my wounds. Then, without a lecture beyond “why didn’t you ask me to do it?” he went out to pick up the big mess I’d made of the wood. He made me so glad to have someone there. That’s another kind of oneness. I don’t hate the woodpile, or even this experience, because I did learn a few things and there’s no permanent damage. The picture above is how my leg looks today (the first photo was too ugly to post!). We can’t always change the circumstances, but we can change our reaction to them. We can evolve to adapt, or we can blame and rage, or we can die. Those are pretty much our choices in this life. And then, this tragedy happened to one of our favorite personal trainers, C. and his wife, J. We had plans to double date at the Alice in Chains/Bush concert tomorrow evening. C texted and told us they couldn’t go because of this terrible thing. In my oneness, in my empathy as a mother and a friend, I crumbled. I laid awake most of the night in grief for this young woman I never met, who I will now never meet. In my fascination with the human body, I’m watching my own healing but the pain in another’s heart is something that I cannot heal. As a mother, I can’t imagine a way to ever heal such a thing, and maybe, like a lost limb, you just learn to endure, to survive for everyone else who needs you. I am glad to reach out and to be there for them in our oneness. Being one with nature is something else again: the overwhelming beauty of the magnitude of the cosmos, with its repeating patterns of fractals and Fibonacci sequences that go from the birth of the tiniest atoms to the expansion of universes. There is movement and life to all of it–even the stones beneath our feet. But sometimes nature surprises us and sometimes terrible things happen, and no great pattern is evident, or not for a long time. The universal energy is within all matter. Energy doesn’t die. It all matters, and because we are here, or were once here, so do we. ACCIDENTS, DEATH, ENERGY, FALL, GRIEF, HEALING, MERCURY RETROGRADE, ONENESS, TRAGEDY, UNIVERSE, WOUNDS  I feel so protected. Looking back over my life and some decisions I have made or tried to make, I see in hindsight that if things had gone the way I wanted, it would have been a disaster for me.
This hit me last night when I finally finished watching the Hulu show, The Deep End. After this series, I was seriously turned off by Teal Swan and ready to write her off completely. But it nagged me: why would she have let all that be filmed? I did some searching and saw her side of things on YouTube. She played recordings made by her team of the same occasions Hulu recorded. Hulu did all kinds of tricky edits and splices to make things look like they happened when they didn’t, and responses were spliced into questions and comments to create an entirely untrue, different image. Also, she showed how these Hulu people misrepresented themselves with false love for her as they had built this trusting relationship over their three years of filming together. Bringing this back to me, I think of the TV show I almost had and what a gift it was that it fell apart. I also remember reading on their website that they wanted character over substance—spiritual teachings don’t sell a series. If I’d been character enough for them, I would have likely been made a fool. I think now about some relationships and other opportunities I have pursued, only to later learn of someone’s true character or to understand that I was not dreaming big enough when I tried to make something happen. I think of books I tried hard to publish; either they weren’t ready, or it wasn’t the right time. I think of how I might have destroyed myself in so many ways, like I was a toddler, playing with a big, sharp knife, and Mom snatched it away as I cried. I am protected. This was a rough summer for me, which is why you haven’t heard much. Part of it was good news: I have been getting up at 6 a.m. and typing until 9:00 p.m. to finalize my manuscript The Magician’s Girl: the history and mysticism of Sylvia Plath and Ted Hughes (forthcoming with Inner Traditions). In June, my husband had knee surgery that had some complications. My mother was in a car accident, and my mother-in-law started chemo. I lost my beloved mentor, Zulfikar Ghose, to cancer, and I had to put down my ancient little cat, Mimi (over 20 years old!). All while reading tarot cards for my clients, attending weddings, and traveling. Whew. I am just back from a fantastic trip to Boston and Cape Cod, where I walked through the private residence that was Sylvia Plath’s childhood home, toured the town of Wellesley, and spent a great deal of time with a friend of the Plath family. Then, I saw Cape Cod by land and sea, stepping back to the 1950s writers’ scene and taking in that incredibly varied landscape. I have an essay coming out in the next Plath Profiles about touring the house, and I will be writing up something about Cape Cod soon. I will post links when they’re published. I’m sorry to have been gone from the blog so long, but I had to make my work priority, and I feel good about that. I hope your summer was fantastic. More soon. xo BOSTON, CAPE COD, DESIRES, HULU, MASSACHUSETTS, OPPORTUNITIES, PLATH PROFILES, PROBLEMS, SYLVIA PLATH, TEAL SWAN, THE DEEP END, THE MAGICIAN'S GIRL, WELLESLEY, WRITER, WRITING, YOUTUBE, ZULFIKAR GHOSE  ‘A Miracle!’ / That knocks me out
–from Sylvia Plath’s “Lady Lazarus” Several years ago, I dreamt that something extraordinary would happen when I had blue fingernails. Haha, dreams are so weird, right? Well, if you know me (and if you’re reading this blog, you likely do know me to some degree), you probably know that I might take that as a premonition. And so, for a time, when I had something significant going on, I’d get my nails done in blue. I did blue immediately after my T.V. show screentest (and then, Discovery Channel pulled the funds for pilots, and Covid, I am pretty sure, put the final nail in that coffin). I did blue nails for writing competitions and big tarot events. And over the years, nothing ever happened, so I quit trying to force a correlation. I just laughed off the blue nails, and I didn’t even think about it for a long time. And then last week, I was in the nail salon looking over their selection and thought, What the hell. Let’s go blue. For no reason at all. And then, it happened—the thing. I have known about Sylvia Plath’s hermetic caduceus for over ten years. It is a hand-carved wooden magic wand sort of thing she made when she was 15, covered with alchemical symbols and it bears her initials, S.P., at the base on one side. Plath Profiles featured this article with a photo well over a decade ago. I never even considered the possibility of owning it. It was well-known to be held by Dr. Richard Larschan, a friend of the Plath family. Long story short, my friend Catherine Rankovic is a scholar of Aurelia Plath, Sylvia Plath’s mother, and had been in contact with Larschan. She told me that Larschan was looking to put this caduceus in the hands of someone who cared. Someone who appreciates Plath’s interest in the occult. And she connected us. Richard Larschan sent me an email, and I wrote him back immediately. After days, I did not hear anything and tried again and again. After all, this is Mercury Retrograde, and all four of my responses did not get to him! Catherine told him that I was trying, and he texted me. That worked, the deal was made, and I received Sylvia Plath’s hermetic caduceus by mail (imagine how I gritted my teeth with all this retrograde stuff happening, fearing it might get lost!) on Wednesday, May 11, 2022. I can’t quite believe it. This caduceus is now the most precious and valuable object I own and is locked up off-site (but visited often!). Dr. Larschan also included a beautiful 1952 photo of Sylvia Plath, inscribed on the back by Aurelia, with its provenance papers and a DVD of interviews with Aurelia Plath. Dr. Larschan calls it Plath’s “letter opener.” My husband has nicknamed it my “splinter.” I call it my magic wand, as I feel now that I can do anything. I am blessed beyond measure. It is such a reassurance that despite all the opposition and exile I’ve faced from the Plath academics over these years, none of their superiority, insults, or petty jabs mean anything anymore. I am so obviously on path. What greater gift could Sylvia have given me than this? No jewelry, clothing, or drawing could mean as much to me. With its built-in alchemy and hermeticism, it is exactly right for me. Even Plath’s tarot cards, which were auctioned off last year at over $207K, were not made by her own hand! (And I do doubt those cards were her only deck, as I have so much evidence that she used a Rider-Waite-based deck for the Ariel poems, but that’s a whole other blog for another time). How is it that one of the most extraordinary things to ever happen to me just fell into my lap? Aside from a few emails, I didn’t even try. This is how God works. Thanks for letting me share my joy with you. More photos are up on my Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. Let me know if you can’t find them. P.S. If you’re a scholar or friend who wants to see it, let me know, and I’ll make arrangements to have it ready for you. CADUCEUS, HERMES, HERMETIC, HERMETIC CADUCEUS, HERMETICISM, HISTORICAL OBJECTS, LITERARY, MAGIC WAND, MERCURY, MERCURY RETROGRADE, MIRACLES, PLATH OBJECTS, RICHARD LARSCHAN, SYLVIA PLATH, VALUABLE OBJECTS |